Burnout

I am in the business of giving and most often than not this means giving pieces of my heart away – usually (but not limited) to human beings. And this is not it: we give instructions, we openly share knowledge and experience, we transfer emotions of positivity and joy. All this needs to come from somewhere – our well of energy within our soul. But a well is a well and it is not eternal, unless purposefully taken care of. It can very easily get depleted if we don’t pay attention to the amount of energy we have been taking out.

A burnout is a seriously unpleasant condition to find one’s self in. And I did. By the time I realized it was a burnout, there wasn’t much to do to undo it. The consequences: a halt in my normal routine and yoga lifestyle which started off due to a persistent pain in the lower back and then amassed to feeling sick for a week. I feel weak and out of focus.

So where is the good news? Of course, there is good news. This time was all about cleansing – both physically and mentally. Nonetheless, it bonded us and made us feel even closer as we were in this thing together, literally.

As much as it is important to learn from such experiences, it is ever better to avoid going this far. To help you learn from my mistakes, I’ve put a short list of tips to help you stay sane in this hectic world and in a good mental and physical condition:

1. Take a mental count of your daily interactions and know when enough is enough. Very, very important! If you’ve had a busy social day where you had to face and talk to a number of persons, then be reasonable and have a quiet restful evening for yourself. I find that people often confuse quiet and restful with boring, which is wrong.
2. Do not be afraid to say NO. Don’t take on more responsibilities than you can take, don’t promise too often, don’t meet people when you really don’t feel like. I know, it is a lot of don’t-s, but they are necessary. Oh, and another one – don’t worry about what people would say. Those who have to, will understand. And the rest – do I really need to comment on those people?
3. Plan for a rest: in the best scenario, you would plan for a daily rest – be it an hour or so, you need this time to recharge in order to face the world smiling again. Should you know for a fact that you would have a couple of busy days in a row, please be kind to yourself and schedule a well-deserved break afterwards. A day or two spent in nature would do the trick.
4. Breathe A WHOLE LOT!

I told you it was a short list! Namaste

Fear vs. Love

We are CONDITIONED (and I'd like to highlight this word as much as I can) to 'think' that fear and love are antonyms, the opposite sides of a coin, 180 degrees far off.  

But hey, I've a revelation to offer you right this second: Fear and Love are not the opposite sides of a coin; instead, they are one and the same thing seen from a different angle. And you yourself are the only one who's got the power to change the angle. The question is: Why would you and why do you?

When you love, you simply love - without any further thoughts, considerations, expectations, conditions, circumstances. When any of these ‘bad boys’ come into the picture though, love begins to step backwards and fear starts to settle in. This unfortunate transition is quite easy to spot in today’s relationships. People tend to fear of losing their loved one to someone else, of boredom settling in, etc. As soon as we start to fear, we start to act differently and this is immediately felt by the other side in the equation. This change in mental predisposition and attitude is what eventually changes everything and usually materializes those same fears. Do not get into that vicious circle, I beg you. I had to learn the hard way - even though I trust all hardships are simply exercises to make us better and stronger. Love without anything further or in between; no need to fear.  

Almost identical… but not so much - the topic of suffering. 

I read today the following which completely resonates with my recent discoveries: Suffering is the result of clinging. Clinging as in holding on to something to the point of desperation. Remember this: you can’t cling forever, it gets tiresome and you would have to let go, one way or another. Let go now, take a leap of faith, win more and lose less by letting time and space offer you new horizons. Stop clinging to one thing. It is like eating only potatoes, how long will you be able to sustain this?  

Very related to fear is of course worry so I feel the need to touch up on this too. Similarly to fear and clinging, worry is useless. Why? Because worrying is practically equal to planning for a negative future. All that worrying can do it shift your focus so that you no longer pay attention to the good stuff happening around you that deserve celebration. It has been said a million times, but doesn’t hurt to repeat this once again: worrying today does not take your troubles away, it only takes today’s peace away.

Think positive and look for positive in order to truly FIND positive. And yes, it does works. Just try it! 

My Valentine

It was Valentine's Day yesterday! I hope you had a wonderful one. Whether you spent it with your better half, a friend, family or simply spoiling yourself, all that matters is that you felt and spread love.

Here is what hubby and I did: we took a trip... To somewhere! Unknown! Without knowing what our final destination is, we hit the road and drove in a certain direction, leaving it completely to our intuition to guide us. And it was the perfect occasion to leave the so very common need to control out of the picture. We wanted spontaneity, we wished for non-conventional and different. And for something very us - so we went for a walk through the woods, did yoga on a sunny meadow, cuddled by a river and gazed at a small picturesque waterfall. Then simply by chance (or not?!), we ended up in front of a monument from 4th century. It was like we found our own treasure and we couldn't take our eyes off it. After we finally did, we kept on driving until we found ourselves at a point where we had to choose a town to stay the night. We didn't really have to ponder much as the right choice was laid out before us, literally, in the form of a road sign saying 'Koprivshtitsa'. Koprivshtitsa is the name of a historical town which was the epicenter of the revolutionary movements aimed at Bulgaria's freedom almost 2 centuries ago. Such an energized place; it can make every Bulgarian feel proud of our origins.

What else did we do there besides the tourist must-dos? Weeeeellll, we finally gave acro yoga a try! Something we've been prepping for a while now. How it was? As one can imagine - super-boosting and it gave us wings! We will surely be practising more of this exciting branch of yoga on a side, wish us luck :)
Warning: Do not try this at home unless you have a consistent and regular practice and have built a strong core.

So, would you also like try acro yoga?

Are manners lost forever?

I remember when opening doors for ladies, offering a hand, offering help, greeting and excusing were very normal and kind of a status quo. Manners used to be essential. We used to have gentlemen and we used to have ladies. Manner were the much needed medium for a smooth human interaction. They were probably the thing (okay, maybe one of the things) separating us from animals. Don't you agree?

What does it mean to have manners these days? I bet some people cannot even remember. Are manners lost forever? Who killed them? Which generation pushed them down the drain? Maybe it was me? Nah. Maybe it's the iPhone generation so lost in their social media world and glued to their mobile devices.

I often feel like a black eyed person walking down the street on a sunny day. I'm odd and nice and talkative; since when did this become abnormal? I somehow missed that part. Am I going to get punished for not catching up with the current 'vibe' of impersonation, distance, ambiguity and universal ignorance? I would like to stay with my manners, please. Please. Will I remain running in circles forever isolated?

The matter of the fact is I might. We have lost manners in our relationships too and this makes it ever more impossible for two persons to have a calm, purposeful and useful discussion. Bigger issue arises here. Is it even possible for two people nowadays to actually decide on a path together, one they would walk absolutely side by side, along which they would both be happy and fulfilled? Sounds absurd.
The story goes like this: You make certain choices and decisions and sacrifice little things but sometimes many of them in order to remain with the greater thing. Then it seizes to be so great or you witness the other side completely disregarding your sacrifices, while he/she gets to do whatever the souls seeks (and don't get me wrong here - I fully support soul seeking!). And then? You are left with ... nothing. Not even good manners anymore! Or the other scenario: your other supposedly half compromises in order to remain on your path until the moment he doesn't! Why? Because they did not feel this path theirs any longer since they left behind most of their aspirations.

If only we would all get a huge mirror and are presented with the exact reflection of what we gave.
So... is everything lost?

September Yoga Challenge

Hallo friends!!

I can't believe it is already the 1st of September (as often as people exclaim this)! Seriously, it is like yesterday was February and we dreamed for summer to arrive, now we count down the days till its end.
It has been quite the mixture of a hectic and relaxed summer that I've been having. Surely many were envious of all the days I spent just walking somewhere, touring around, chilling, and oh - partying of course. I did study quite a bit which seems to have tired me. This is why I have decided to create for myself a September Yoga Challenge starting today. It actually started 2 hours ago when I started my first yoga practice for this month during which I intent to practice yoga every single day. This first practice took about 50 minutes and I mainly focused on twists and stretching and breathing (as am also tiny bit sickish so I need to restore my energies). Doing yoga every single day for such an extended period as my goal has not happened to me yet and it will soon be 2 years since I first discovered yoga. Hopefully this month will not only deepen my practice and help me achieve things I did not till now, go deeper into the poses, but also help me spread the word even further and gain more popularity. I wish to encourage more sceptics to come and try this 'yoga thing' at least once. This is why I created my own page Moga Yoga with Maya - to let people follow my practice, my struggles and the way I change my life bit by bit, how it affects me, hoping that this will intrigue some and push them to do that step forward and dive into this journey. Because it feels just so great! Challenge yourselves with me? Follow me and let's explore what happens :)))

Openness, Pure Love & Friendships

I figured out something else this evening. And this is how it happened.

It's been hard for me to study these couple of days. I tend to have my focus somewhere else - the inner me, feelings about the world, yoga. Therefore, it was quote painless to convince myself to take my mom to the international movie festival happening in town. And so we went. And remained there for 4 hours; and yes, it was that good. First, we saw an Estonian movie about a so called 'crazy' girl (she doesn't speak to people) who falls in love with the town's drunk and playboy but when one night she disappears with him, everyone turns against him viewing her as the victim of his lustful abuse. Then, we saw a movie from Denmark telling the story of an innocent man accused of molesting a child which happens to be his best friend's daughter whom he takes care of in the kindergarten. Both movies were very powerful and moving, and yes, I shed some tears.

What moved me so much were the simple things things the stories revolved around  - pure love and best friendships built over many years. These two are probably the strongest forces there are out there, we just need to use them as prescribed.
I didn't want to come home but we did so then I remained on the balcony for a good 25 minutes staring at the gloom, cars, rain, the little lights. I eyed quickly the balconies of the blocks nearby to see if there was anyone else out there, sunk in thoughts inspired by the world outside. Shockingly, or not, there were 3 more souls out there, smoking cigarettes, one standing and the other 2 seated with their head resting on their fist. I caught myself wondering whether this is the breed of thinkers left in here - a few smokers and a lost-in-the-movies girl who quite often feels out of space. Where are all the others and what are they doing? Probably mundane daily things - like watching the news, having a beer, washing the dishes. Nothing should be accepted as mundane though as then it impacts our perception and one day we end up perceiving the people we see/are in touch with daily as mundane and tedious. How to counter this? I got it: by being OPEN!

Not sure whether it was the movies or the rain (it tends to have that effect on me) or the lack of sleep lately but I felt a wave of gratitude over me for the pure love and best friendships that I have had and have and will have. I am open about it and wish to remain so. So I told them right away. Please don't keep it in, share, share, and let them others do their skeptical grimaces. From all I know this world is in a desperate need of pure love and best friendships. And the way I see it, it should never be enough or too much to tell the people who make your existence worthwhile how you feel. Do it now. Do it every day.

Peace. & Love

It's Springtime, awareness time

It seems that every spring brings something new with itself. At least from my perspective. But this is how it is going to be, right? Another spring, another life. To me this spring has brought in realization.

Most of you know I have been practicing yoga for some time now. I’d like to tell you about an experience I had two weeks ago (this is not to undermine yoga’s ability to deliver ‘an experience’ every single time). I was ‘locked in’ – a phrase I like to use to imply I have been studying all day; hence I needed a release break. I put my mat on the floor and started. I am not completely sure what it was, but at one point I started seeing things – like castles in the skies, fields of flowers and gold, sunshine, all glittering in front of my eyes (even though what really was there was the sink). What does this mean? Have I gotten used to being with my SELF? Have I discovered where bliss hides?

I’ve been reading a lot lately. All kinds of written words, sentences, proverbs, pieces of wisdom. I especially liked what one girl wrote on her social media profile: that we are all light, part of the big light, so there is nothing to fear or worry about. We are here to be light, so we shall shine with all we have – smile, be happy and spread joy. And light. I have also been observing a lot – there is plenty to observe and we don’t have to especially go on the hunt and look for it, it is all around us. Just pull your blinders up and you will see pictures being painted before you. Can you imagine yourself standing in a green field talking to a donkey and a horse? No? Then you must try it! I did that a week ago and it was another one of those blissful experiences - the connection with nature and its creatures felt natural and essential even. I felt good and much lighter after conversing with the donkey and caressing the horse on its head (yes, it allowed me!). I can only imagine they felt the same J  

Back to urban land, I have noticed something which is considered as kind of normal but is also kind of petrifying. People have got used to getting used. I guess I need to elaborate a little.

You could put any verb after this sentence and it will probably remain true. I will give you an example:   People have got/are used to… EXPECTING.  People have got/are used to… LOVING. People have got/are used to… TALKING. You see what I mean? Do you notice how even the ‘positive’ note of ‘LOVING’ is lost because people are now used to it, therefore there is no more flame in it. Talking, on the other hand, was once a useful tool for communication, which has leveled down to simply an act of passing the time. We no longer speak about the important stuff because if we do, we might be excluded from society and titled ‘ODD’. So we remain in society and we follow the rules of expecting. I know, I was there once not too long ago as well. We walk through life expecting the next Christmas, another season, our next birthday. It becomes even more problematic – we have become unable to just go with it without the frantic need to plan the next thing, step, meal, and meeting. You can hardly find a person just strolling alone with pleasure, not going anywhere, not hurrying for anything in particular. Why did we turn our life into some frantic hunt for the unknown variable? I don't know. What I know and can say with the certainty of someone who's had the experience herself is that such a life could be turned around - in less than a year, even in less than 3 months, should you REALLY WANT IT TO.

I believe in taking your life in your hands and building it the way you want it to be. I always did and had always tried to even though I was not always ready to. Remember – without a shift in thinking, there could be no shift in attitude. So read, learn, open your eyes to the other sides of the stories, and make that shift now. Because every day - in your newly found happy place, matters. Take a moment to live, and live NOW! This has been a marvelous realization for me, I wish it will be for you too.